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...Damn.   
10:00pm 23/01/2006
 
mood: eh.
I haven't updated this thing in so fucking long.
Hah. I'm barely even the same person.
Weird.
Soon I'm going to be the only kid left in this house.
Maybe when I have nothing better to do, I'll start updating this again.
Since I'm sure you all care so much.
Kbye!
 
     

((4)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
Goddamnit...   
10:14am 22/03/2005
 
mood: hungry
I suck at being sneaky.

I just got my CD player taken away! Grrrrr. And I don't even know who the hell the person is that I have to go to to get it back. That was a lot of "to's". But yeah.
So I found this un-labeled old mix CD I made probably over a year ago (it have Evanescence on it, and I haven't liked them for a reeeally long time.) randomly sitting out in my room, so I popped it in the CD player and gave it a listen. The CD was almost 78 minutes long and I just sat on my bed and listened to the whole thing. I don't even know why. All the songs reminded me of everything in the world and it was fucking crazy. I was getting, like, sick from the flood of memories and emotions to my brain; I seriously thought I was going to puke. And I sat and wrote 5 pages in my journal about all the memories.
And then I got the hugest urge ever to listen to 13 Ways to Bleed Onstage. So I brought it to school today, and I get it taken away. I just wanted to satisfy my overbearing urge before I strangled myself in aggravation! BUT NOOOOOooOOooOoOOOoO.

Oh well.
I guess I'll have to wait to go home and get on the computer and burn another copy.
Because that's what I do.

I say that too much.

And in case you are uninformed, Courtney and I got OCS for skipping and....yeah. It wasn't bad. I ate some guy's and Courtney's carrots for lunch. Yum.
Courtney says, "Errrawroughhhgh," I think is how you spell it.
And now she's laughing at me.



P.S.....I love them scabies. ;D
 
     

(la guerre.)

 
   
11:14am 18/03/2005
 
mood: annoyed
So yeah, apparently, the only reason I'm staying home is because Courtney gave me dope and I'm going to smoke it while my mom is at work.
I'm really not staying home because my acid reflux is fucking killing me.
Nope, not at all.
I was even planning on leaving and going and having sex with everyone I work with, and then drink and smoke and do lots of other unhealthy things.
I didn't want to stay home and rest and load myself with antacids.
Well, I guess I was going to stay home when I brought lots of people over while my mom was still at work and have a party and let everyone vandalize everything and DEFINITELY not rest and DEFINITELY not load myself with antacids.
Because that's what I do.


I don't think I've ever had to deal with this much insanely pointless bullshit in my entire life. I haven't even dealt with it yet and I already want to smash my fucking head into a brick wall.


I really, really love my mom. Especially when she makes my acid reflux so much better.
 
     

((4)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
   
12:04pm 17/03/2005
 
mood: blank
Stupid assholes, no one is online. I've barely stayed in any of my classes all day today. Right now I'm skipping out of gym (yeah, I'm a hardass) and..Courtney says hi. There's still, like, 80 years until this period is over and then I'm gonna go get lunch and...yeah. I went to the libary during study hall and then got up and left for about 20 minutes because I was getting really shitty for pretty much no reason. I got a french vanilla coffee iced latte thing and...Before that I had a bagel and Hawaiian Punch. I went back to the libary and sat there and read The Rules of Attraction and everyone around me was sleeping. Then I went to SRT and had to go to biology during first session to take a quiz, but I never had the chance to get the materials I needed, so Mrs. Hallett just gave them to me and told me to take it whenever and to not forget about it. Then I waited outside Courtney's biology room for her to come out, but she never did before the session was over. We were gonna go in the elevator, but I guess we're gonna do that pretty soon. I can feel my acid reflux again and I can taste it on the back of my tongue. Isn't that disgusting? So now I'm in the libary again after I went to the nurse from gym and got a Tums. And that's about it. I feel kinda stupid today. Yesterday Christiana and I randomly decided to hang out and we walked to my house and sat in my room and drank sour apple pucker schnapps while musing about how amazing it tasted. We went to Tuesday Morning and Chaos and Carmel Music Center pretty drunk and we were talking really loudly. I thought the girls that worked at Chaos were really nice for some reason and I was going to go over to them and talk to them, but I realized that when we walked in, they got really quiet. Heh. God, I'm crazy. Well. Courtney and I are going to go in the elevator now and I'll eventually suffer to death from claustrophobia.

But that's okay because Muse.....is semi-soon.

<3
 
     

((1)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
   
01:10pm 15/03/2005
 
mood: EXCITED BITCHES.
MUSE.

In 40 days.

AHHHHHHHHHHHh!hHHh!h!hh!h!h!h1H11HH1HH1H1H1H!!!!!!!!!!!!!




40 days of excitement = heart failure. I'M SO EXCITED.
 
     

((3)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
   
10:25pm 19/02/2005
 
mood: silly
I'm so stupid...

I just put foil in the fucking microwave.
 
     

((4)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
   
08:10am 14/02/2005
 
mood: weird
My esophagus is burning and I think I might die.

I came all the way to LiveJournal Land to tell you that.

I actually don't really know if I'm gonna die or not, I was just saying that. Hopefully I won't, though.

Heh. K bye.
 
     

((4)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
   
08:38am 10/02/2005
 
mood: wired
Ew, I ate a bagel before my Adderall kicked in. I'm not even sure if that's how you spell it. Does anyone even know how to spell it? Uh. I can't really stop moving. And I can't close my eyes that well. Holy shit, I don't know what to do. I took my Concerta this morning, too. So it's like, DOUBLE KICK. Ugh, I'm such a loser. It says cap lock is on, but when I "turn it off", it locks on caps! Bitches. Oh god, I feel like pukingggggg. But I don't want to. I'm gonna go get a pass for SRT. Uh. Okay. bye. Never mind. I'm just gonna go. Have fun!!!!
 
     

((4)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
   
08:28am 27/01/2005
  Well hello again, kiddies. Don't you like how I always address everyone else as kids? I guess you wouldn't know that since I update, like, once every 342857 milleniums now. But yeah. So, I'm at school now and I'm in study hall, and since my study hall teacher (he was hired just to be a study hall teacher) doesn't give a fuck about what we do, I decided to mosey on over to the library and..find something to do. Everything else that was interesting is pretty much blocked, so...hah. I don't even know what I'm writing about. I ahve two study halls in a row since I got kicked out of that infernal AVID class. I swear, that thing only made school worse. But now I have to find another class to fill my first study hall period with so I can get credits or whatever...but I don't know if it's too late or something. Geh. I'm so awake, wtf is up with that? Yesterday I got a good night's sleep and I was fucking tired as hell and I slept in all my classes. And now when I have three hours of potential sleep time, I can't sleep at all! And I left Tursh awake all alone these last two nights and I feel really bad. Plus, I took my Concerta this morning after not taking for GOD knows how long. Maybe I should work on my English project. Courtney and I miraculously ended up in the same English class this semester and we're doing a project on the Charles Manson trial TOGETHA. Woot woot! It's actually really intersting the way he thinks/thought. I didn't know he was still alive. Maybe I'm just retarded and misinformed. It doesn't seem like he'd be alive, ya know? Damnit, why is MySpace blocked but not Livejournal? Tssh. These people. They block the weirdest things. Courtney and I found this site called 2violent.com on Monday and it had lots of information on the Charlie trial, but when we came back to it on Wednesday and it was gone! I was like, BITCHES WE NEEDED THAT. Shit, there's a class coming in this pod. Byebye.  
     

((2)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
2 4 6 8 who do we appreciate!   
01:15am 27/12/2004
 
mood: :(!!!!!!!!!
Hey kids. Havent been here in a while. Huh. Wellllllllllllll I'm in Virginai with Courtney, who ID O NOT HATE. Uhm. I cant really type rtight nowa nd COUrtney wants us to go downstairs but i cannot gety up and she thinkgs I hate her! But I don't! She was sitting on my lap and i THought I was going to pass out which wioiuld have been bad and now I can't get up. EWe have yto go to Maryland tomorrow and go to the thrist store and buy styff and then go to target and get essentials and then uh go to the HardRock Cafe!!! Ow i chave a headache. Courtney is talking toher boyfrined. I dont have a boyfriend, bnut I should. But boys kinda suck beacuse they hate me. I dont' know why they do, though. Uh. COURTNEY FUCKING HATES ME DUDE. She won't talk to meeeee! Dear god, ig cnat go downstairs and now shes going to make everyone hate me.. Oh my god. i dont like being hated because i cant go donwstairs. Thats a stupid reason. OKay, i'm going to like...go be sad npw because courtney hates me. :(
 
     

((6)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
I drank Mike's Bawls...and now all that's left is a blue container devoid of liquid.   
07:57pm 29/09/2004
  Sorry, I keep making these little microscopic updates because I barely ever have time (I WILL, THOUGH, DON'T WORRY.) to like...get online and do shit and write in my journal. It really makes me angry because my mom insists that I have homework (even when I don't) and won't let me do anything pretty much. But yeah. So I'm alive and still kicking. The Homecoming dance is in...two days and I got all excited about it because this was going to be the first social event that I've gone to without Staci...but she's kind of fucking going now even though she goes to a different school. She's fucking going with Teagan, who she swore she didn't like not too long ago. And she's going to ruin everything, even though she won't really try. She just really depresses me with the way she flaunts herself around large groups of people. I hadn't talked to her since the baseball game until today when she was on the Internet. But yeah. Whatever. Maybe I'll just ignore her completely with Tayler and Boner and...whoever else. Gah. Damnit! And I was all excited to go without her being there :(
Fuckin' balls.

Well, kids, maybe I'll get on later tonight and write a big long entry about everything! With pictures! Woohoo!
 
     

((4)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
Please could you stop the noise, I'm trying to get some rest...   
11:34pm 22/09/2004
 
mood: blah
Hi, kids.
I just feel like randomly posting in LiveJournal...to let you know I'm still alive and well.
Since you care and all, I guess.

But yeah...I was going to write a big long entry about shittiness, but I don't really feel like it now. If you're lucky, maybe you'll get it tomorrow.

In the meantime, here's a thing:
Popular interests among burn_likethesun's friends
1. music (19) 11. art (7)
2. love (11) 12. friends (7)
3. sleeping (10) 13. kissing (7)
4. writing (10) 14. drawing (6)
5. piercings (9) 15. laughing (6)
6. movies (9) 16. hugs (6)
7. rain (8) 17. reading (6)
8. concerts (8) 18. donnie darko (6)
9. photography (8) 19. taking back sunday (6)
10. singing (7) 20. johnny depp (6)
Interests gestalt
My most interesting friend is desiredfate who has 13 of these interests,
followed by deathbeat (13), kornkween (12) and smurfette420 (11).
Normality Index
My friends are 90.39% normal.
Analyze me !
Username:
Popular interests created by _imran_


Good job, Poop! You're interesting :D But that's kind of a given, seeing as how I wouldn't father anyone's children unless they were interesting. <3
 
     

((1)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
"They looked like they wanted to stop...but then they didn't."   
12:52am 19/09/2004
 
mood: chipper
So...Tursh came home from work Thursday night with this DVD that her friend gave her about like...vegetarianism from the PETA, so I was like, Hey, cool, let's watch it (WHOA overuse of commas there.) what harm can it do? Fucking shit. I don't think I've ever been so scarred or brainwashed in my entire life. It had that "Meet Your Meats" video...documentary thing on it. I watched that once in 7th grade because it was enhanced onto the Goldfinger CD, but that one was shorter and didn't have sound. This one was, like, 13 minutes long and...I freeze up every time I think about it. While I was watching it, I was seriously curled up into a ball and crying and shaking and freaking out. I fucking hate people! It's so weird because I could totally kill a person, but I couldn't harm an animal in any sort of way. Well, I don't think it's weird, but some other people seem to think differently. *ahem* Yeah, so I couldn't sleep all that well that night and Friday wasn't much better at the beginning. I was all tired, but every time I fell asleep in class, I'd dream about it.
Even so much as looking at meat makes me sick now. It's not like I'm even trying to not eat it...I just can't. Ew.
So that whole video made me want to be like...10x healthier than I am now so I made my mom buy me vitamins and I want to walk/ride bikes everywhere now.
Which brings me to my next story. Melissa and I rode our bikes to Broadripple today! Five miles there, five miles back. Probably more on the way there, because we kept getting lost and side tracked. We asked so many people, and they all told us the same thing but we just wouldn't understand. Hah. How can you lose the Monon Trail!? SO, we got there safely and all, and first thing I got was a sno cone. Fuck, that has to be...the best thing I have ever consumed in my entire life. Oh my god...Wow. Haha. Pink lemon sour, sour apple, and sour grape. :o~~ We went into this Net cafe place expecting to find food and free computer useage, but we were obviously very WRONG. So we left and found a place to hide our bikes and went searching for a food place. We found this pizza place and I got bread sticks and cheese sauce, and those were really good, too. Damn, everything is better in Broadripple! slkgjslkjh Why can't I live there?! Hmm. After that, I think we walked around looking for Metamorphosis because I wanted some new guages, but the only pretty ones were expensive as all fuck. We went into Pitaya and it looks EXACTLY like Chaos! The only reason we stayed in there was because they were playing Abandoned Pools and I wanted to listen. I really wanted to go to Broadripple Vinatage, but I had no fucking clue where it was. We asked everyone in sight, but everyone gave us different directions and Melissa was getting agitated because she had cramps. I thought we had found it at one point, but it was one of those indie...stoner...stores. I got a ring there because I felt bad just going in and asking for some other place and then leaving. But yeah! The guy there actually gave the right directions and we found it. I got this other ring there that had probably been sitting in the case for years because the tag was all faded and I couldn't read it =\ And for all Melissa's hard work, I bought her this hippie ankle bracelet that jingles. But before we went home, I decided I wanted to go back to this store we stumbled into earlier and get a shirt I saw. LOOK AT IT:

Wee. It's from The Magic Bus. The lady who sold it to me was like, "I put your lighter in your bag," and I was like, "...What?" Then she told me she gave me a lighter and I was like, "Cooool, thaaanks." Heh. And then the ride home was really painful and long. The seat of the bike I had was uncomfortable as hell (and yes, hell is quite uncomfortable) and...my ass/crotch still hurt.
I think this is being dragged out long enough.
And this entry is long. I'm getting tired of typing.
Heh.
So bye.
 
     

((4)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
   
10:59pm 15/09/2004
 
mood: rushed
Oh, hey, wow. I haven't updated in five days. I updated last night, but I deleted the post because...well, I don't know. It made me mad for some reason.
So yeah! Uhmm...On Friday night after Tursh got back from work, we went to Adam's apartment...again, and there were so many more people there. Like there was Eric and Holly and Chase and Leo and Adam's neighbor people and Sean and then us, and Josh came a little later. Sean was already all sick when we got there, so he went to sleep and took my body pillow. It's still there, too. =\ And then Leo was acting all Russian and shit and it pissed Adam off in his drunked stupor, so..he almost kicked Leo's ass. It was kind of scary...but then Adam started getting sick and went to sleep. We left around 4 and my mom woke up, like, 15 minutes after we got home. Gnyeh.
Annnd..then Melissa left the next afternoon and I went over to Amanda's house to spend the night and get crunken all over again. But uhh...I can't remember a whole lot from then, so I'm assuming it was good and fun. Weee.
Then Sunday I came home at 4 and I was still buzzing all day. I have no clue how, though. I guess I'm just a lightweight. It was kind of hard to do my homework, but I got it done because I'm amazing like that.
My mom just asked me if this entry was a report for some class....*blink* and then she just sat there and looked at the screen. o_O
Okay, anyway, then I worked Monday night and that was pretty shitty AS ULWAYS. And uhh...Tuesday was...okay, I guess. I went to Wal-Mart with Tursh at 1:30am and we stayed there for at least an hour and a half getting random shit, and I completely didn't even get CD-R's, which was the reason I wanted to go in the first place. I didn't get to sleep until 4:30 or so and I was dead tired all fucking day. I had to run to Latin because I was late, and like...I felt like I was going to die. I fell asleep several times in every class (besides gym, of course.) Oh god, my fucking gym teacher today while we were playing flag football told me that I "needed to lose some of my jewelery, especially the earrings because it wouldn't feel too good if I got hit in the side of the head." At first, I thought she was going to tell me I needed to lose some weight, in which case I seriously would have been like, "WHAT THE FUCK!?" and charged at her. Haha, and secondly, wouldn't it hurt anyway to get hit in the side of the head? Oh well, pain is pain and I really don't fucking care. She can suck my imaginary balls, that cock-choking son of a bitch.
Oh, last night, Tursh called my cell phone and said that Jessica (this girl I work with) came through the drive-through at Wendy's and told Tursh that Leo died or something. 'Cause, see, apparently someone called his house and his mom said, "He's not here anymore," so everyone thinks he's dead. I mean, at the time, it seemed like a plausible conclusion because I haven't even heard from him since Friday and he drank a lot but he only threw up like...once and then passed out in one of the rooms. Geh. I still have yet to find out if he's even okay, because I strongly doubt he's dead.


AND I HAVE A NEW AIM SCREEN NAME AGAIN FOR THE 398456TH TIME THIS YEAR. It's a Tighter Noose. Yeah bye :D
 
     

((6)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
Thanks, SmarterChild...   
11:41pm 10/09/2004
 
mood: really amused
...LESIONS.


We had an AIDS convocation during SRT today and...it was an hour and half long. And the guy said "lesions" like every 10 seconds. And on the big projector thing, it would say, "LESIONS" really big. Hahaha. And bright green. That was the only thing I found amusing about it...because AIDS isn't funny, even though some immature freshmans (yes, I meant to say that.) thought so. Fuckers.
Soooo. Melissa is at my house currently. She waited at Dairy Queen while I was working, and I felt kind of bad. She's sitting next to me eating her nails. Her fake nails. Fake.
I feel like I'm mentally retarded or something...I've gotten so random and crazy. Maybe it's the extensive sleep deprivation! Oh my god, I figured my own problem out as I was typing it. Rad.

I love fake arguing with people when they're actually trying to make me offended, but then I just act like a complete retard in return and laugh my ass off about it...It's just...so wonderful. I love you, Judd. I really do. Baby.

My dad needs to go to bed.
 
     

((2)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
   
03:33am 10/09/2004
 
mood: stupid
Gnyeh o_O
There's bleach and foil all over random parts of my head. My hair needs to bleach faster...because my mom is going to be up in...like...an hour, and we still have to put the fucking blue in. Silly hair. I just want to put the blue all over my head, but Tursh told me it would make the roots look funny, but I really don't care...
I don't know if it's because I'm insanely tired or what, but I feel all dizzy and...weird.

I have no idea what I was going to write about. Maybe I'll remember tomorrow when...I'm..not...so retarded? Haha. Fuck, tomorrow night is going to be the funnest shit.
I don't want to go to school and work tomorrow.
And I love weekends.

P.S. to Melissa- Kara is going to be there tomorrow and so are, like, 4 other people from work...So yeah. I just wanted to tell you. I'll..uh..see you at the Q tomorrow o_O
 
     

((5)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
   
06:15pm 08/09/2004
 
mood: pissed off
What the fucking hell, beauty supply stores fucking suck! I got home from school and started doing my homework really fast so Tursh could take me to Sally's to get bleach and blue dye, but by the time I was done and ready and asked her when she wanted to go, she was like, "It's probably closed by now."
WHAT KIND OF FUCKING STORE CLOSES BEFORE 6?! skjghkjshui!!! Goddamnit! I hate it when I get all pumped up to do something and I want to do it right then, but then it can't happen. That's almost worse than sleeping. Fuckers.
Well, anyway, the weather was really nice today. For some reason it reminds me of visiting Matt at college...and I have no clue why.
But yeah, it was a pretty good day at school. Nothing remarkable happened. I mean, come on kids, it's school. And there's veggie corn dogs waiting on the stove for me to eat them. I just felt like venting my anger towards senseless beauty supply store owners, damnit. Fuck them.
 
     

((2)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
Mourn again without the sorrow...   
02:25am 08/09/2004
 
mood: I don't fucking know
Hah, wow. Today kind of sucked. Key word = kind of.
I tried to sleep last night, but I couldn't because somehow my nose running like a faucet does not allow sleep. So I just stumbled out of bed when my mom yelled upstairs. It took me forever to get ready because I kept randomly stopping and resting. I got to school and...I don't know what I did, but I didn't do my descriptive essay thing until I got to Latin. It was really fucking half-ass. I can't even remember a word of what I wrote. When I got to English, we were peer-editing, but I didn't have anyone to peer edit and the kid who did mine was fucking...retarded. Oh well.
I had to keep fighting the urge to sleep all through the fucking day and it was really annoying. During geometry, I did fall asleep for 15 minutes and when I woke up, there was a puddle of liquidy snot on my book and...it was disgusting.
When I finally got home, I went right to bed until 7:30, and then woke up and did homework. I still fucking hate sleep. Then I started freaking out because I still don't have any Cornell notes for AVID and...I don't know. I fucking hate that class, too. It's fucking everything up. I really want to do well in it, but I'm so far behind and I don't know how I can catch up. Bleh.
Well, hot damn. What the hell am I talking about? I'm just like bitching about random stuff.
I made Tursh wake me up when she got home from work because I don't like sleeping. I think she's rather confused by my distaste for sleep. I kind of am, too, I guess. Sleep just gets in the way.
Now there's some bump on the bottom of my jaw on my neck.
I hate being sick.
My mom was going to give me this Tylenol Sinus PM stuff, but I looked at the expiration date and it expired four years ago. So she gave me this perscription stuff Tursh got a while ago. Thank goodness that wasn't expired.
I think I'm going to go to the counselor tomorrow during AVID and talk to her about how much of a failure I am.
w00t w00t
Good night.
Fuck, it's cold!
</ nonsensical banter>
 
     

((2)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
Give me a plate of fluorescein, I'm gonna paint an ugly scene...   
02:55am 07/09/2004
 
mood: dorky
Hahaha, every time I breath in through my nose, my right nostril makes this clicking noise. It's really amusing. It sounds like that sound a gas oven makes when it's trying to ignite a flame with a spark or something.
Yeah, so I don't know why I'm awake. I got on the computer to find out how in fuck's name I'm supposed to write this desicriptive essay for English, but I realized that I can just get to school really early and get my text book (which is what I'm supposed to have in the first place...) and just sit at the pillars and write it.
I really think I'm getting sick. I'm even coughing now. Too bad all the cold medicine is gone =\ I don't even know how the fuck I could get like...a cold. Are you supposed to be thirsty when you get colds?
Fuck, it's a really nice night outside. Even though the bugs are loud as fuck. I like how I use fuck as a positive interjection. But it's all 66 degrees and breezy. Weee.
Holy shit, I can't wait until Abandoned Pools comes out with their new CD. I thought they were dead or something, but they're up and active. This new song is so ccuuttee. AHHH! I can't sing along! Oh no :( Fucking cold-type-thing.
I hate bodies. Bodies like mine are too weak to do anything.
You know what sucks? Boner burned me like..2 or 3 HIM CDs, and I completely left them at her house. And then I left my cell phone and Tamagotchi at work, and it was too late to go back once I got home. Gah! What if my Tamagotchi dies!? That would suck so much fucking asshole. I have to go retreive them tomorrow after school.
Last night at Boner's house, while we were falling asleep, I remember randomly sitting up and saying to her, "Wouldn't it be funny if half the world was made of tuna?" And she said, "Haha, yeah...Then people would eat their kids' arms when they got pissed at them." I love crazy exhaustion-induced ramble.
Okay, I'm going to go paint my nails now.

P.S. I didn't really leave after my last entry. I just thought my dad was going to bitch at me, but he didn't. Just thought you'd like to know.
 
     

((6)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
Oh baby, baby.   
11:25pm 06/09/2004
 
mood: rushed
I think I'm sick...or maybe I just have allergies. My nose is really stuffy and my nasal cavity is like...clogged.
So. Friday night, Tayler came over and spent the night. She had to stay at Dairy Queen for a few hours, but then she went home with Matt and me. Matt was here for the weekend! It was spectacular and he worked with me on Friday. Heh, yeah. Sooo yah. Then around 2am we went with Tursh to Adam's apartment and got drunk with Sean and him. That was all fun and stuff. I've never been drunk before...but it was just light beer. Like, 1.5 cans gave me a buzz o_O Heh, Sean did this impression of our boss at the DQ that was absolutely wonderful. He went into the closet, came out a couple seconds later and yells, "I'M GAAAYYYY!" Hahaha. I guess it's alot funnier when you're tispy, because it doesn't seem too funny now.
Then Saturday morning Tayler left and Staci came over a little later in the afternoon so we could get ready and go to the Indians baseball game. We went on the Monon and to the bridges before we left because we hadn't been there in forever. That was pretty fun...I guess. At the game, we just walked around and...followed/watched people. There was this guy that looked like the singer of Finger Eleven that we kept passin by that I really wanted to talk to, but he kept walking by really fast and I didn't want to stop him, so Staci and I devised a plan that she would get his attention and I would go in for the kill, but she ended up taking him over and making me look like a complete Finger-Eleven-obsessed freak. Hmmh. So uhh...we sat with this kid for a while and then Richard called, so I talked to him for an hour or so? I didn't want to talk to anyone else. We got home and made plans with these two people we know (Brandon and Brandon...they're good guys, trust me.) and we were going to sneak out and hang with them, but then Adam called my cell phone with Sean and Leo from a pay phone and was like, "Hey, wanna come over again?" Hah, so yeah. We ditched the Brandons and went over there. Leo is a really cool kid outside of work, and it was alot more fun this time around because we were there for an hour longer. They picked us up, and then Tursh came a little bit later. Fuck, Adam's puppy is so goddamn cute. We were all sitting in the dark and she was sleeping on my torso. Ahhh, I love that puppy! I want to steeealll her. We came home at 4 and Staci and I crashed on the bed.
Thennn...Staci left Sunday morning and I went to bed until 5:30. My aunt and uncle and cousin randomly came over and I wasn't aware of it. My aunt came into my room was like, "Sharrrrrroonnn, why are you sleeping??" I was like, "...I'm..tired?" and she wouldn't leave until I got out of bed. I was sitting there in the kitchen listening to them talk, and my mom told them that Tursh is a vegetarian now, and they were like, Why? And my mom told them because she saw baby cows at the state fair, and you know what they fucking did? They started laughing. That pissed me off so much. So I took my cousin upstairs and talked to him and started cleaning my room for some random reason. Then Boner started text messaging me and I ended up going over there to spend the night. We ate a lot and I made her a shirt that says "Jesus sure got a nice tan on the cross, eh?" with a huge cross on the back while we watched Jesus getting beaten on The Passion of the Christ. That is the only part I have ever seen of that movie. Oh, crazy crazy us. We ended up falling asleep while watching Kill Bill Vol. 2. Then this afternoon, we ate this chicken salad stuff her mom made, and I was looking at the huge gallon tub of mayo they had...and it smelled pretty gross, so I looked at the date. Sure enough, "BEST IF USED BY 04 AUG 2004." Gyeh. Fucking mayo, I am never ever eating it ever again.
Yeah. Then I had to work today. On Labor Day. I didn't know that didn't apply to Dairy Queen as well. It was busy as hell and there were alot of asshole-y customers.
And shit, I have to go now because I was supposed to go 15 minutes ago. KBYE.
 
     

((5)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
That's you in that photograph from 1973...and you don't even know me...   
02:49pm 01/09/2004
 
mood: blah
I never get on the fucking computer anymore. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not.
Well, uhm, I went to this party thing on Saturday that was decently fun with Melissa. We went to the mall beforehand and tried to find cool clothes and stuff...but kind of failed. Hmm. Alot of people know who I am that I don't know. At least 4 people at the party were like, "You're Pants?! I've heard so much about you! I'm so happy I met you!" IT'S NUTS. I don't like it when I don't know people who know me =\
And uhm...I worked Monday and Tuesday nights, which, as always, wasn't too fun. Brittany came to visit me and stayed for a couple hours. I got really bad cramps and she ran home and got me some Advil. Then Josh was like, "Pants, I know why you're in pain and it's absolutely disgusting," so I was like, "Well SORRY Josh, I didn't mean to not get fertilized so my UTERUS DOESN'T BLEED." Mhmm. Same thing happened on Tuesday, except I didn't have Brittany to give me Advil or Josh to pester me about my girly time. I just had Leo to be a terrible and slow and stupid worker and make us really slow on drive-thru. I hate that kid so much. Bleh.
And then today I got to stay home from school because I had even worse cramps this morning. My dad woke me up and I took a shower, and then I went into the kitchen to get something to eat and my lower abdomen started eating away at itself. So I curled up on the couch and waited for my mom to get home from walking the dog. She gave me medicine and a heating pad and told me to lie down on the couch and rest, and I fell asleep. It was so nice to be out of school. I fucking hate high school! Well, I fucking hate Gold days (which is what I missed!). Those are the worst, because I have AVID and orchestra. For all of you that don't know, AVID is this...program thing for people who lack the motivation to work hard and who still want to get into a good college or something. It feels like they're expecting too much of me too soon, and it takes up an elective class block for all four of my high school years. Not even cool. And orchestra really blows balls now. It's so hard to keep focused and Mr. King sucks at teaching. I want to quit orchestra and go to another one, but that's not even possible. Since quitting either of these classes is not a possibility, I'm going to stop bitching.
I've been sleeping all day and I'm still really tired. Sleep is fucking evil. Garrrgh. So yeah. I'm going to go satisfy my evil urges and go sleep because there's nothing better to do. Good...night.
 
     

(la guerre.)

 
   
03:40am 28/08/2004
 
mood: hmm.
There's nothing cooler than going to Wal-Mart at 3am and buying kickass nail polish, a comfortable bra and sleeping pills. Absolutely nothing. It's also pretty cool that they automaticly assume I'm over 18 because I'm there so late...and I can buy sleeping pills underage. Hah. Yeah, I'm cool. I'm also really tired. So I'm going to sleep now. And my mom's going to be up soon. Psht. What a crazy woman.
 
     

(la guerre.)

 
And if your instinct's always right, how come you're all alone....anything can happen now.   
03:14am 25/08/2004
 
mood: lethargic
Mmmhmm. Once again, no sleep for Pants. Not even when she wakes up at 6 in the morning and keeps alert the whole day. I don't understand this. I'm not forcing myself to be awake at all. It's so weird...I can sleep for hours at a time when I don't need to even when I'm not all that tired. Gahhh. Yes, I do say, "Gahhh" alot.
Hmm. So, these past four days have been a rather interesting adventure. I hung out with Adam on Saturday night at like 2 because I recently found out we live down the street from eachother. We went and picked up Sean and went to Meijer and Steak 'n Shake and got free food...kind of. Fun was had by all. I pussied out and went home at 4 because I was scared my mom was going to wake up early and I'd walk in while she was getting ready to walk the dog or something. Mmmhmm.
I really enjoy going to Wal-Mart and Meijer after 1:30 in the morning. It's all dead and boxes and stocking stuff is strewn about everywhere. It makes me feel more comfortable. Well...Maybe it's just because there's no one ever there.
And then- guess what, you'll never believe it- I went to school. At the end of the day, I had gym and it was blazing hot and stuffy as hell in the fucking gym, and we had to do these fucking...retarded relays. I'm still sore from them. My gym teacher is such a bitch. I am going to murder her if it's the last thing I ever do. All that strenuous activity made me lethargic and overheated for the rest of the day. I even got to go to work! Weee! Actually, work wasn't all bad. I brought my digital camera and took a few pictures because I'm a loser like that.
When I got home from school, my mom took me to Cingular Wireless and I got a cellular telephone. I feel all responsible now. I even have my own plan that I get to pay for. Woowoo! It's one of those color screen flip phone and it's rather fun to play with, though it doesn't have too many features. All the ring tones and backgrounds SUCK, so I spent all day trying to find cool ones. I ended up getting two Coheed ones (Time Consumer and Devil in Jersey City) and spending way more than I should have because they were from this other site. Yeah, it kind of sucks. My mom's going to yell at me when she sees the bill (Already! Hah!) even though it's my own money.
Hmm. Wow, I think I might actually be able to sleep this time. We'll see.

Sorry, I just realized this whole entry is one huge complaint. Don't worry, though, I still love you.

Yay! The tiredness is talking now :D
 
     

((4)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
Oh my fucking under god, shut the stupid up.   
01:58am 21/08/2004
 
mood: okay
WOW, I wrote a complete entry in my LJ client thingamabob, and I completely forgot that I didn't even post it and I exited out of the client thingamabob. Fuck. Now I have to start all over again.
So uhm...When Tursh got home from work at 1:30am on Thursday morning, I demanded that she take me to Wal-Mart and get sleeping pills. We decided we wanted to get a digital camera, too, but the people that were working didn't have the key to open the camera case. I took some last night around 11 and waited for an hour for them to kick in, but they never did so I took a second dose. I watched some of Big Fish and started getting drowsy and went to bed. Within two minutes of lying down, I started feeling like I was tripping and I couldn't fucking sleep at all. My eyes were closed, but it felt like they were wide open and that I was seeing through them. I went downstairs an hour or two later and started getting drowsy again, but when I tried to go back to bed, the same fucking thing happened. I did eventually get to sleep, though, but not for long. When my mom woke me up, I was still strung out and it was not very comforting. I hate sleep and everything it stands for. Sleep is such a joke! Beth gets more sleep in one night than I have this whole damn week. Gah, fuck you, sleep!
I went to Wal-Mart again today and got a digital camera that was on sale for $80. It's pretty good, I guess. Tursh came to see me at work and brought it in and took pictures. And I made a new icon from one of them. The flash is, like, 80 billion megawatts so I look albino or something.
I got one of those body-length pillows, too, and I'm just sitting here squeezing the nonexistant life out of it. It's so comfy! It makes me want to hug or cuddle with someone.
I like how the bottled waters we sell at Dairy Queen have "NOT FOR INDIVIDUAL SALE" in kind of bold print at the bottom. Absolutely love it.
Blah, so, first week of school is now over, and I realize now that I hate it. It's so disorganized and...shit. It makes me feel mentally lost. I completely forgot to do my biology homework and Mr. King isn't a good orchestra teacher. To me, at least. I still think Mr. Nobles was a better teacher. I mean, he wasn't as funny, but he was definitely was top notch. GAH. Anyway, my legs hurt.

And now for a random picture of my entry from about 10 minutes ago:
 
     

((7)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
   
10:33pm 19/08/2004
 
mood: annoyed
Sleep sucks. It makes me almost late for school, it prevents me from going to Wal-Mart while the electronic department is still open, and often times it costs money. Psht.
 
     

((2)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
   
03:39pm 18/08/2004
 
mood: bouncy
Wow, I haven't been online in, like, 3 days. It's a fucking record.
So...I started school yesterday. I didn't sleep at all that night and I didn't sleep at all last night, either. I think I've gotten a total of 3 hours of sleep in this past 48 hours. We had to go to our SRT the very first thing in the morning, and that completely screwed me up so when I had to go to 2nd period, I went to 3rd. And those classes are on the complete extremes of the school. My 3rd period class is on the 3rd floor on the very west side, and my 2nd period class is on the bottom floor at the very east side. I've been late to almost every single class, too. I guess it's cool...'cause it was the FIRST DAY and all. I also discovered that I am rather popular. I hear my name getting called several times each passing period. It's nuts! I've never felt more important in my entire life.
I am so fucking hyper. I just walked across the street to the library since my mom won't let me on the Internet at home...because of school. Hah. So yeah. There's this guy to my left and his skin is like...red. He looks Australian. He has huge guages and he's wearing pinstripe shit. I want to run up to him and watch him over his shoulder...Hahaha. Shit, I'm hyper. I was hyper yesterday after school, too! AHH! High school makes me hyper. I made Richard drive me home yesterday because I didn't want to walk home. And uh..I have to be at work in an hour and I really don't want to. I could fucking stab someone right now I'm so hyper.
I came in late to lunch, and practically everything was taken so all that was left was this...chicken noodle shit with crunchy crap on top. So..I got that since I was insanely hungry and I only ate a 3rd of it and now my stomach hurts. I fucking hate school food. Gah. Well. Uh. Now there's an old guy to my left that's blocking the Australian guy.
OH MY GOD. Okay, during biology today, these two people were like, "I'm going to ask you a really stupid question, and I'm sorry if it's wrong, but are you on buddypic.com?" And I was like, "Heh, yeah..." And they were like, "OH MY GOD I KNEW YOU LOOKED FAMILIAR YOU'RE THAT PANTS GIRL!!" And I'm like, "...Yeah, I am...!" And the one guy was like, "Dude, you're on the fucking cover for the AOL thing" or something like that...and they fucking knew who I fucking was! GJHGJKSHGJ! I don't even know what the fuck he was talking about but they knew my name and everything and...fuck. Heh. Yeeeah. I'm gonna find something else to do. And then I'm going to call my mom to pick me up. Because I'm not fucking walking in this...heat. With my huge pants.
 
     

((3)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
And if they find you lost again, what will you tell them then?   
12:11am 15/08/2004
 
mood: bouncy
Hmmm...My sea monkeys didn't work at all. There's just a bunch of...crap at the bottom of the tank :( Fuckers! I did everything right! Psht.
I had a really weird dream last night. It was really long and I don't remember it in order, but it was really realistic...kind of. I'd type it out, but I'm pretty lazy right now.
I went to bed around 3:45, but I didn't get to sleep until like..6. My mom made me wake up early because her cousins came, and she wanted me to be polite and say hi to them and shit...So yeah, she was showing them the family portraits and she got to my individual one, and she was like, "Isn't Sharon beautiful?" And they were like, "Oooh, I thought it was Sharon Osbourne! Haha!" I just kind of looked at them and said thanks...and went back upstairs and slept until 2...and worked at 5. Well, I went kind of early because I was so fucking bored, but that's about it. Today was really fucking boring. I was overproductive at work and now my legs hurt.
I only had one thing to eat today and I'm not even hungry. Hmm...That's cool, I guess.
I miss listening to Finger Eleven. I left my CD player in my locker when I went to the high school and it has my Greyest of Blue Skies CD in it...so I have to pacify my need for Finger Eleven with my Tip CD. Hmm.
I don't want to start school in three days. I don't even, like, have any supplies. I just have a binder and a couple pencils. Psht. Oh well.
 
     

(la guerre.)

 
They're not very pretty...But neither are you!   
11:19pm 13/08/2004
 
mood: happy
Oh my goodness, I am so fucking happy and I have no clue why! Today was a really goddamn good day. Greg came home yesterday or something with his fiance, Angella and then Matt came home today with Karyn and we were all home at the same time...Gahhddd, I don't know...I feel all nostalgic now. I really miss being young and we all did stupid shit together and we were all cool. Like, I keep thinking about when we used to go to my grandma's in Maryland, and my cousin would come too and we'd go into the basement, turn all the lights off, and just beat eachother up. That was a really long sentence, but that's one of my most favorite memories ever. Weeeeee.
Hmm. So yeah, since we were all here, my mom took us all (fiances too) to Wal-Mart and got family portraits. Then we got like...individual photos taken because my mom doesn't want to pay for school pictures, and mine turned out pretty good. I got a background that's like...black and white, and it looks like a dungeon door. It's way HxC. Then we came home and a couple of Greg's friends came over and we had a party for Matt and my mom since their birthdays are two days apart (My mom's was yesterday and Matt's is tomorrow). Staci came over at like 7:30. I love how she just walks in my house and is like, "PAAAAANTS!"
Fuck, dude. My mom is 50 and Matt's gonna be 21. Hah.
Yeah, so anyway. Uhmm...everyone I talk to that reads my LiveJournal thinks that I like Eric. I think it's because I said we were flinging candies at eachother and calling eachother names, but we were all doing that. You crazy fuckers. Eric is, like, 20. And that'd just be really weird...because we work together. =\ Eugh.
When I get really happy, I feel like puking. And killing people. Haha, it's like I always want to kill. I think I'm sadistic. Weeoo!
I got lots of cuts on my hands yesterday. The high school is full of sharp-edged objects. Not a very good place a good parent would want their kids.
Okay, I'm gonna stop writing now. Have a wonderful day, fellow...people.

P.S. Tayler, I ate tacos and nachos today! :D
 
     

((4)Ceci est la guerre.)

 
Perfect in its spledor like the currents of the weather...   
12:48am 13/08/2004
 
mood: content
Hmm. Overall good day today.
I went to the high school very early in the morning to get my schedule when I thought no one would be there. Pah, I was wrong. I had to stay for a long time because it took like 89 years to find my damn locker. We have biiiig ones! I can even fit in it. And I had to get my picture taken for my ID and it looks like shit. My hair...looks like shit. I know everyone says that, but that camera thing doesn't like me. It makes me look poopy. And I saw Annie and told her that she made me mad, and she was like, "Pants...I love you! I never knew I made you mad! I'm sorry!" And I was like, "...K, cool," and I walked around with her. Too many people started showing up so I secretly left everyone and went home. Then I took a nap until 1:30 when I had to get ready to go to OrChEsTrA campz0rz. Aaaaaannnndddd then I went to that for four fucking hours. I'm completely horrible now. I've barely played my violin all fucking summer and I suck. I feel bad. We had to play these weird games. One was like, people on the outside made a fence, and the people on the inside had to close their eyes, keep their hands on their knees, and walk backwards and try to find the opening in the "fence." The most fucked up game I have ever known to be conceived. What it has to do with orchestra...don't ask me. Hmm. Then I went to work at 6. Dude, today was a fucking fun day at work. I worked with this kid, Eric, that I've never worked with and he's awesome. His new name is Fucker. We all goofed off and acted all immature the whole day like flinging candies in eachother's faces and name-calling. Weee, I wish all days were like this. My hands smell like bleach.
Hmm ^_^ I feel goood. I took more Nyquil, but I don't feel retarded. I'm kinda tired, actually. I want Bagel Bites :o~ Gahh. And I want to lay down. Haha.
 
     

(la guerre.)

 
You can run away, but you can't escape all these wicked games...   
03:18am 11/08/2004
 
mood: numb
Yeah. Yesterday was cool. Christiana came over and we went to the strip mall thing with Wal-Mart and stuff. We crossed the huge road to get to Best Buy and we almost got hit by a car. Fucking scary. It like..didn't stop and it was going really fast. We got lip gloss that smells like strawberry Pez.
Then today, Caitlin Black called me and was like, "I'M BORED, WANNA COME OVER?" So I did. It almost seems like we never stopped being friends. Like, we stopped talking after I was in 6th grade and she was in 7th. Then I hated her because I thought she was a poser and a whore...And now we kind of started talking again this summer, and it's not really all that awkward. So uhm...we went to Bubs and got waffle fries...stuff. We went to Tuesday Morning and I got a cool sea monkey kit that made me really excited to be alive.
I went home and got ready for work. Courtney and Jyl came in to visit me. They told me they went to X Fest and saw the guys we were with when I met James...and they're going out with them now. Courtney said something like, "James died of a heat stroke! It was so fucking funny..." and I'll be damned if that didn't make me really excited. I asked if she was being serious, but she said he just passed out really badly. But...then they told me that he was with this girl he's going out with now, and she told them that she and James were going out during MayDay. So uhm...that means James was going out with both of us. That then made me realize that every time I've gone out with someone, I have never been the only one. Never.
Ever.
I'm like...some kind of accesory to everyone. I kept crying at work because that news got me really depressed. I'd be okay for a little bit, then someone would ask me what was wrong, and I'd get all teary eyed. Fuck, it's happening again.
Sorry, I took 4 Nyquil liquigels and I can't really...piece stuff together. I've kind of lost my trust in everyone...and it took a while to build it up. Gah.
I have to wake up at 9..today and I have to take a shower and go to work. Blagh. Larry's going to hate me.
Gah. Fuck.
Sleep would be kind of nice right now. I feel all tired, but I don't feel like lying down and sleeping.
I just wish I could be someone's only one...I don't think that's going to happen soon. I want to kill.
I want to sleep.
 
     

((5)Ceci est la guerre.)